"When I opened my eyes I saw the night sky. When I awoke, my eyes only saw a roof and and a sigh forced its way out from my soul"
I spend most of my time as a cat now. I lay wherever there is a warm spot in the house or if the weather is nice, I go through the kitchen window and lay on the warm ground. And these days, whenever I close my eyes it seems I instantly go into dreaming. I dream of the past but because they're dreams, I cannot tell how realistic they are. Nevertheless, they are mine and they bring me a lot joy.
It's hard say how long, but dust bunnies live for a very long, long time. I guess, until they decide to turn into a cat that is. After that decision is made, death seems to come in like a roaring train out of control. Perhaps that is why, as cats, we are always so jitter at first. Death scares us just like it scares everyone else. But just like everyone else, we get used to the fact. It's going to happen anyway, right? So why freak? That's where I am now. I like to lounge, spread dust only passively, and the rest of the time I sleep. But back then, I was wild. So full of energy that I knew that I was going to make history. "Dust Bunny makes history" would be the title of the post or something to that flavor and it would paragraphs and paragraphs of where and how much dust I've spread all over the world. You know, I'm not that old so a lot of the cool records have already been done and finished. Like, there is no way I'm going to ever dust up a dinosaur or anything. But there are still places to leave a mark. Ever heard of hipsters? So supposedly their pants are so tight that you can get anything else in them…we'll see about my dust. BOOM! You see, all you have to be is creative and creative I am, so I thought I'd make history quick. And at first, I thought I was on that track. This feeling was so vivid that I dream about my first time dusting all time. You never forget your first time.
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"Alright kid, take it easy. It's your first round of many rotations before you go solo and I'm here to make sure you don't screw up."
"What is this guy talking about", I think to myself. "Hey old balls, I'm going to be fine. Just tell me when to rip."
"Old balls???? You kidding me? I may be old enough to dust your great grandma but I ain't got old balls!", said Old Balls.
"Yeah , yeah. I read in her diary about how boring it was. Come on, let's get this started, already."
"Punk ass kid. Alright, this is your standard warehouse. It's huge, so don't go too crazy. If you want my advice…kid! I didn't tell you…damn it."
I'm off to races! This place is pretty big. But that just means I have more space to run around and dust. I'm thinking I should do the fan strategy. I'll go from one end to the other fanning out to cover as much space as I can. *Poof *Poof *Poof I'm working like crazy here. If I could sweat, I'd be sweating like a lawn sprinkler. *Poof *Poof *Poof I'm bumping into everything, holy shit. Huuh, huuh, huuh…
"You doing alright, kid? Looks like your pretty spent."
"Shut. up. Old Balls. Can't you see I'm making progress here!"
"Not really…", Old Balls mumbled to himself.
Man, I'm working my ass off and I can't seem to get anywhere. This place is too big for one bunny to tackle alone…yeah Old Balls is trying to trick me…his Old man Balls can't trick me! No wait. Maybe this is his place and he knows he can do it and he's testing me. He saw how killer I was in school and…Ah-hah. Tricky old man moves. Screw that. I'm not letting Old Balls show me up. I won't leave an inch uncovered. Time to try the jump in air and beat chest method and make it rain dust. HA! I can see him now, shaking his old head of his. How do you like me now, huh?! How. Do. You. Like. Me. Now.
Some time later, I can't even tell how long, I'm exhausted. But I'm not giving up. I'm just rolling around at this point. Grinding on this and that and hoping that I have some dust left to spread. Damn it. DAMN IT. Old Balls knows I'm done. He knows. He fucking knows. I don't want to give up. I'm not going to give up…so give me an out. Give me an out, you jack...
"Alright, times up. Get over here and let's examine how you did from up here", said Old Balls and pointed up towards the roof. "You can still float, can't ya?"
Pssh. "Of course I can", I hope at least.
"And here I was pacing myself! Should have told me it was timed!"
Thank god it was timed. It took all I had left to get to where he was at. Couldn't he have chosen a lower place?
"Now, look at your work. What do you think?", asked Old Balls.
"Uhhhh" I can't see anything at this point. It looks exactly the same as it did before I came in.
"Well?"
"Well, looks like I did a pretty good job."
"Open your eyes. You pulling my leg here? I don't see shit as far as dust coverage. It looks just as clean as it did 3 hours ago."
"Yeah, but…"
"Shut up and listen." "It looks like you didn't get anything dusty because you tried to cover too much too quickly."
"Well, I was trying to…"
"Damn it, just shut your mouth and listen. You tried to do too much and really didn't get anything accomplished. This is a problem. Say you got 30 out of 100 tasks done. You completely saturated that shit with your dust. You did alright and finished 30% of your workload. Now say you did some or even a lot of all 100 tasks. How much did you get done?"
"100%, boss. That's my style."
"Got to be joking me. You got 0% done, asshole. Nothing. Zero. You failed terribly. Look beneath you. You did horrendous. And look, I'm not trying to give you a hard time. You're young and stupid. But I bet you'll be good and it's my job to help you fulfill your potential. So don't say nothing and listen. It's better to focus on one task at a time but keep looking ahead at what needs to be done. This way your finishing things as your surveying the rest of what you got to do. But you got to stay steady. One thing at a time until you get comfortable. Then you'll be able to do more and more."
"…."
"You even listening, kid?"
"Yeah, Old Balls. That was sure some great advice. I'm serious. Thanks."
"My name is Barry. Stop calling me Old Balls."
"Yeah, yeah. You made some great points Old Balls. You really did SMACK*
+++
And this is when I always wake up. I assume he hit me. Whatever. I forgive him. But you know, his lesson, I took that to heart. Wise old balls on that guy. Real wise. 'One at time. Keep it steady. Keep it moving forward.' those phrases became my mantra.
